I am a SuperSHERO

SuperShero #4 – Sandra

“I was conceived under painful circumstances. From birth till I was 5 hectic fights between my parents were common. I became such an angry child. My mom decided to finally leave, being raised by a single parent was not easy but definitely worth it”
“I drew strength from my mother and learnt that I need to teach any man how to treat me like the Queen I am. I learnt that it’s ok to walk away from situations and people that don’t make me happy and that I have every right and full ability to free myself from any type of abuse”
” Growing up, I admired my mom so much for playing multiple roles so well but I longed so much to have a father figure, I envied everyone who had someone to call *daddy*. I still had this amazing love for my dad even though no one had any good to say about him. I started questioning God and blaming him especially when my never present father passed away, it made no sense because then I was father-less forever”
“I have spent my life questioning God, asking him why. I have to say, I am a great actress, no one knew I had issues, no one knew I was a ticking time bomb, I hid my anger and pain so well, I refused to be seen as weak and miserable.”
“At age 19 I was hijacked, beaten and gang-raped, I hated myself, I hated this country, I hated men, I lost my sanity and I resorted to isolation, I refused therapy and I neglected all my friends and family, I still did an amazing job acting all was well, I gained a lot of weight from the medical treatments and emotional eating and I hated myself”
7 months after I was gang-raped, a man who was like a father to me molested me. I was so crashed, broken, hurt and confused.”
“My biological father and my Spiritual father had both disappointed me and dismally failed to represent God in my life; I made a decision to stop crying and to stop questioning God. I hated men so much it scared me. I still did a great job at hiding it all; I would not allow anyone to see that I was in pain. It was until I finally accepted that God was my Father that I gained my sanity back.”
“I was stubborn, even after being fatherless, gang-raped and molested, I refused to accept it all, took it all and hid it somewhere in my brain and pretended all was rosy and well.
” I was in denial, secretly dying, depressed and becoming toxic with a smile on my face to the world”
“I came to a point where I could not keep it in anymore and I laid my heart down to God, I got on a painful journey where I promised myself I would express myself, cry, talk, cry, pray, talk, cry.”
“An expressive life is good, the shame is gone, I don’t hide the events of my life, I am a happy earthly-fatherless, gang-rape and molestation survivor, I am free from hating men, I’ve let go of questioning God.”
“All it took was to accept all that had occurred in my life, to stop hiding pain, leave being stubborn and secretive behind, FORGIVE my father, my dad and my rapists.”
“My painful and traumatic experiences made me realize that God is omnipotent and he uses every moment to refine, prune, mould and equip us for our destiny. I draw all my strength, peace and freedom from His promises”
Quote: I am a diamond: Planted by God in this filthy earth, refined by tribulation, deep boiled by circumstances, submerged in acidic events but in the process to shine for God’s glory on his finger, the pulpit._ Me
The prayer of my entire life: “Psalm 119: 10 I seek you with all my heart, do not let me stray from your commands. 18 open my eyes that I may see the wonderful things in your law. 27 let me understand the teaching of your precepts, and then I will meditate on your wonders. 37 turn my eyes from worthless things; preserve my life according to your word. 50 my comfort in my suffering is this: your promise preserves my life. 74 may those who fear you rejoice when they see me, for I have put my hope in your word. 116 sustain me according to your promise, and I will live, do not let my hopes be dashed. 125 I am your servant, give me discernment. 175 let me live that I may praise you, and may your laws sustain me.